Cow Fart Offsets

Cows fart methane a major contributor to global warming. Apparently because of some "special bacteria in their stomachs, kangaroo flatulence contains no methane and scientists want to transfer that bacteria to cattle and sheep who emit large quantities of the harmful gas."

Al Gore should contribute funds to scientists trying to isolate these special bacteria. Then, when he is criticized for flying in a private jet he can claim that he is offsetting his jet's carbon emissions by reducing the methane emissions of cows.